Caring For Yourself
Rediscovering the Power of Self-Care as a Path to Wholeness and Ministry
I originally posted this on another publication called “New Theology of Self-Care,” but decided to pull it over here. Over time, I will be reposting Substack Articles I posted over there for consumption and integration here on On A Long Run. I will be posting these articles on Monday’s so as not to disrupt my normal Wednesday posts. ENJOY!!!
*Note: This is a revised and somewhat rewritten version of an article I first published in April 2022 on RunninRev Writings. I thought it would be a great starting point for this Substack.
Care For Yourself
We can argue about how much someone should or shouldn’t say what I’m about to say. But even though I don’t have a degree in psychology, sociology, or any behavioral science (my degrees are in religion and divinity), I’ll still say:
“YOU NEED TO CARE FOR YOURSELF!”
Things Need to Change
In the past few years, I’ve become a strong advocate for self-care, not only within the church community (as a member of the #clergylife) but also in society as a whole. This basic idea of taking care of ourselves shouldn’t be new or something we even should have to fight for. Caring for ourselves should be something we naturally do and part of how we live together. I want to think that self-care would be as easy as taking care of others sometimes. However, on many occasions, our inability to truly care for ourselves ultimately ends up affecting how we care for others as well.
I’ve come to understand that most of us, including myself, aren’t particularly adept at self-care. However, faith isn’t about achieving perfection immediately; it’s about continuous growth and maturation over time. This realization prompted me to delve deeper into the concepts and ideology behind our practices of self-care and well-being. It appears, particularly among Christians, that while self-care should be an integral part of our spiritual lives, it often falls by the wayside and is neglected or even met with negativity of selfishness. There are spiritual reasons for self-care, and even biblical examples of God’s practicing self-care and prophets, apostles, and other individuals in the Bible doing the same and modeling this lifestyle for us.
An Extended Theology
With everything going on in the world, especially in the church, I believe it’s time we start having conversations about and developing a theology of self-care. That is, connecting our personal well-being to our beliefs about God. As we go through this journey, let’s pay attention to these areas and listen to our inner voice that guides us toward what we truly need.
My Journey of Self-Care
Throughout my life, self-care has manifested in various forms. This includes my life before and during my tenure as a pastor in the United Methodist Church. I remember my youth struggles with ADHD and finding coping and management skills. I remember the school-life balance that took place while I was in college and graduate school. I even remember the surface-level forms of teaching around self-care when I went through licensing school as a brand-new pastor. However, the most significant growth I’ve experienced has come during times of overwhelming stress and struggle. This is always tough because it creates a very “reactionary” lifestyle that neglects to think “all of this could be prevented.”
The Pandemic Was Rough…
My most recent burnout was during the COVID-19 pandemic, like I am sure it was for many others. In fact, it was the driving force behind my original podcast, The Active Faith Podcast. I started the podcast and even began writing to explore the conversations we needed to have to move beyond and create space to know the importance of self-care as a spiritual practice. I shared stories of self-care practices that have always been there, and even some that I formed during the pandemic.
I’ve heard stories of how people have tried to care for themselves, and it’s been a rollercoaster. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. But in both cases, we’ve learned something. I believe it’s worth the effort to find a way to take care of ourselves as we live out our call to ministry. This should be true for everyone, regardless of what they do for a living. We even start with the most basic question:
Why is self-care so important?
Burnout and The Great Resignation
I don’t believe anyone would dispute the significance of self-care. However, I find it peculiar how we express it when burnout rates are rapidly increasing. We hear terms like “The Great Resignation” used to describe the huge number of people who have left their jobs because they feel so burned out by their work, or they have felt their worth in the workplace has been so devalued. Yes, there are all kinds of reasons behind those feelings of burnout, and many times it begins with the way we care for ourselves and continues in recognizing our own needs and fighting for them.
The Great Commandments
Self-care is the key to our well-being; mentally, physically, and spiritually. To me, it’s simple: we can’t “pour from an empty cup”—a phrase I heard during my journey in seminary that still resonates today. In the Bible, when Jesus gives the “Great Commandments,” he tells us to love God first and foremost and to “love our neighbors as ourselves” (Mark 12:28-34). If we want to truly love others, it has to start from within.
It means understanding our own worth and caring for ourselves fully. That way, we can imagine what it means to love others without selfishness. I’m not saying we can’t love others and ourselves at the same time, but I do believe that the latter can’t happen without the former. If we don’t prioritize self-care in society, I fear we’ll continue to care for others the way we care for ourselves—which isn’t at all. And that would ultimately create a self-centered society where we judge others based on behaviors we shouldn’t rely on.
I’m worried that if things get tough, many of us might not see the divine image of God within ourselves. And that would cloud our vision of the divine image we’re called to see in others. Self-care is important because it defines the inherent worth of all humanity. As we care and minister to others, we’re reminded of the Kin-dom of God, as described in scripture. It’s an image of people feeling loved and cared for, not just by their creator, but by the creator’s creation as well.
This Calling to Self
In our fast-paced society, we’re constantly pressured to work long hours and neglect our well-being. We’re labeled as lazy for taking a day off to recharge. But here’s the truth: taking care of ourselves is not selfish. It’s essential for our mental, emotional, and physical health.
We’ve been conditioned to believe that working 80-hour weeks and never taking a vacation is the way to success. But this lifestyle is not sustainable. It can lead to serious health problems and burnout. And when we finally reach a breaking point, we’re often judged for it.
But what if we changed our perspective? What if we saw self-care as a fundamental aspect of being human? What if we prioritized our well-being and made it a non-negotiable part of our lives?
When we take care of ourselves, we’re better equipped to care for others. We’re more patient, more compassionate, and more resilient. We’re able to give our all without feeling drained.
So, let’s start a movement. Let’s encourage each other to prioritize self-care. Let’s make it a priority to take care of ourselves, not just for ourselves, but for everyone around us.
Remember, taking care of ourselves is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength. It’s a way of living that honors God and glorifies him.